well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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