so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize