i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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