You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
