I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
