Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
