the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
