i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
