I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
