You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize