perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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