Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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