I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize