Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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