i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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