just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
