dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
