Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
