he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize