I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
