Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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