Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
