dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize