I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I could make wine with my vomit
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
