He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
