Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
