Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize