I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
