i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
