oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm just crazy horny about you
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I believe in your delicious
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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