My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
