my room smells like sperm. sweet.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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