would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
