Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Randomize
