he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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