you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
