I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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