Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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