I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
