i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
