I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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