I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
