shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
