Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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