She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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