I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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