dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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