I wish my penis had an off switch
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
