God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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