About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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